Yes it has been almost forever since I last made a post. Yes I have been slacking on my writting. No I don't feel terible about it; but I do feel a touch sad. So to show you I'm still alive, here is a new short story for you.
Relieved from the strain, my body relaxes and melts onto the soft grass. With IPod in ears, feet crossed, and fingers laced across my chest, I smile as the warm sun cast a sleeping spell on me.
I’m older now. There is a beautiful woman lying next to me. Her soft, smooth body warmly fits with mine. Her smell is intoxicating, her touch is soothing. She is the source of my strength, and my kryptonite. Then darkness surrounded us and she is taken.
I’m at the bottom of a tall, steep, mountain. On top I see her tan skin, and the great demon Wuxi Fang behind her. I’ve fought him before; it should be easy to kill him again.
The rock is dark and crumbles away like dry cheese in my hands as I climb. Soon there is no base to the dark pillar of rock. The wind is slowly lifting the mountain to the sky. I see soft clouds above and I climb faster.
Finally, I come in range to attack just as we reach to bottom of the large clouds; I jump with all my remaining strength, sword drawn, flying with body in position to kill. In his maggot infested eyes, I look for his next move, but I don’t see it.
Something hits me from the side knocking me to the ground. I look for what hit me and see that it’s my friend Donkey Kong. But something is different. His eyes. They are like Wuxi Fang’s, full of red maggots. I charge at him, dodge a punch for my side, and deliver an open palm up and under his sternum making him disappear.
I see a whispy tail come for my face and cut it off clean before it can reach me. The end of the tail falls to the ground. I stand ready and alert; always keeping my eye on his kill spot and waiting for my chance.
Then I see my chance. I maneuver around and through his many tails and thrashing fists and I drive my sword into the back of his skull. Feeling the sword crunch past his skin, and glide into the soft mush that is his brain, I scream and push the blade in further. As I jump off his thrashing body I’m hit by his hidden stinger. My body twitches as the poison that will slowly turn me into one of him, fills my body. I crumple down next to the bloody and limp body of my lover.
I look behind me to see Wuxi Fang shrieking and cursing me, swearing he will come back again and then I’ll be under control. His shrieks turn to honks.
I open my eyes and have to squint to see my mom home from the store. I pause my music and hear her ask me to help with the groceries.
Um... lets do a list
-A list of whats going on-
-I have a dull thud pounding on the sides of my head
-I feel a bit queesy and all around bad
-Moving sucks. It may very well be the cause of my feeling gross and out of normal
-I need to get out SO much more. The only places I spend time at now is old home, new home, occasionally school, and the places in between
- I hate not being in school. I go crazy on three day vacations. It will be amazing if I'm not a compleat loon by the weeks end.
- I "plan" to start training so I'll have a chance at being Timpviews new keeper. This is includes a better diet and more time out side. again I say "plan".
-I need to get a hobbie or enjoy doing the ones I have now, alone.
- I need to get more friends. Preferably ones of the male gender. Because if I've only learned one thing the last few years is that boys and girls can't stay just friends for long. Here is the cycle.
I think you (the girl) are pretty cool or cute
We hang out in a group a few times
We are friends for a while
I start thinking your cute again
Soon we become "friends" that just so happen to kiss
We get sick of that indecisive bull crap and become Boyfriend Girlfriend and maybe go on a few dates
We break up
Best case scenario we stay good friends and its not awkward to talk about other people we like
Worst case, it ends terribly and we never talk again and I most likely have bitter feelings
yeah that crap has to stop
- I found I just go down hill fast in everything when I'm not physically active or out side a lot.
- I still seem to ingnore that fact. If you can't tell by my aditude, this is one of those times.
- For once in my life I'm wanting homework. Math homework even!
- Something is very wrong here.
Group story series: Story 4-
Story FOUR
I never expected that one day I'd open my closet and find... a mouse-spider.
The mouse-speder jumped onto my face and tore the irises out of my eyes.
I screamed and fell out of the window.
Hitting with a slpat.
"Well that was seriously gross" I said to billy.
"No its' not. Everybody does it. Just... slush!"
And then I pulled out of my dagger and stabbed the kgnome to death.
Blood was splattered everywhere.
And it smelled of old feet.
And tasted like the greatest thing ever suddenly, a comet flew at me.
But no! It turned into a dinosaur, which tore my head off.
Story FIVE
I never expected to one day open my closet to find... a small door way. It was a very small door, the size of my shoe.
Then it bite me.
It hurt so bad, its teeth peircing my flesh, drawing blood.
And then I cried and vomitted ... At the same time.
It was SO exciting!
Then we turned and escaped into wonderland.
But then the Queen of Hearts turned us into blood sucking stabbing maniacle ZOMBIES.
'Tis the greatest sensation!
I pitty the man wo has never experienced it.
Then litte miss muppet sat on her chair.
Story SIX
I never expected to one day open my closet and find... a grizzle bear attacking a narwhal!...
Which was wearing a magical wizard hat...
I didn't really know what to do. It grabbed me with
its scary looking tenticles and held me over my personal toilet.
It shoved me down the toilet, and I was flushed into the sewer.
I pulled a machine gun from my pocket, blasting the roof of the sewage pipe.
Screaming bloody murder the whole while.
So to shut her up I pulled over at a gas station and bought her a sucker.
I think she likes to suck.
But who knows? Maybe her lips were naturally shaped like that.
Or maybe the nuclear testing had done more damage than I had thought.
I never expected that one day I'd open my closet and find... a mouse-spider.
The mouse-speder jumped onto my face and tore the irises out of my eyes.
I screamed and fell out of the window.
Hitting with a slpat.
"Well that was seriously gross" I said to billy.
"No its' not. Everybody does it. Just... slush!"
And then I pulled out of my dagger and stabbed the kgnome to death.
Blood was splattered everywhere.
And it smelled of old feet.
And tasted like the greatest thing ever suddenly, a comet flew at me.
But no! It turned into a dinosaur, which tore my head off.
Story FIVE
I never expected to one day open my closet to find... a small door way. It was a very small door, the size of my shoe.
Then it bite me.
It hurt so bad, its teeth peircing my flesh, drawing blood.
And then I cried and vomitted ... At the same time.
It was SO exciting!
Then we turned and escaped into wonderland.
But then the Queen of Hearts turned us into blood sucking stabbing maniacle ZOMBIES.
'Tis the greatest sensation!
I pitty the man wo has never experienced it.
Then litte miss muppet sat on her chair.
Story SIX
I never expected to one day open my closet and find... a grizzle bear attacking a narwhal!...
Which was wearing a magical wizard hat...
I didn't really know what to do. It grabbed me with
its scary looking tenticles and held me over my personal toilet.
It shoved me down the toilet, and I was flushed into the sewer.
I pulled a machine gun from my pocket, blasting the roof of the sewage pipe.
Screaming bloody murder the whole while.
So to shut her up I pulled over at a gas station and bought her a sucker.
I think she likes to suck.
But who knows? Maybe her lips were naturally shaped like that.
Or maybe the nuclear testing had done more damage than I had thought.
Group story series: Story 1-3
I've posted storys put together by my class before.
This time it is different.
The rule was that you could only see what the person before you wrote. So as after you put down your sentence, you fold the sentence that you read and passed it on.
Sadly a lot of them came out grusome/slightly crude; but we all seem to laugh.
Story ONE
I never expected that one day I'd open my closet and find... an actual monster inside. It was nighttime and I was doing a little tidying before bed when I opened my closet to see my greatest few staring at me.
A dwarf with a beard several feet long holding a copy of the Bible.
The beard reminded me of a holy man he must have been that hairy missionary I saw on the news.
But I suppose that man wasn't holt at all, for out of my memory the holy man stepped, with horns on his head and hooves for feet.
It was Michael Jackson, resurrected from the dead!
I screemed and grabbed a bazooka, blasting the unholy being
It didn't do much, besides blasting a huge hole in its middle.
Like an uber belly button.
Since it was like an uber bely button, it flopped and jiggled like Chris Farley on speed. Eventually it died of exaution.
Story TWO
I never expected that one day I'd open my closet and find... another door. One that led to a world where life and death meant nothing to anyone.
It was a chaotic but wonderful place, a place where everyone could do as they pleased.
Clothing was optional.
And of course I was stark naked as clothes are quite limiting.
It was breathtaking when money started flowing from my butt like a broken ATM machine.
Until the quarters, and 50 cent coins started coming out.
Then I yelled and jumped for joy at the vending flow of coins.
Ca-ching! Yes! This is why I love Las Vegas!
Because of the gambling and the buffets and the shoes
Story THREE
I never expected that one day I'd open my closet and find... a bathtub full of lime juice.
The strange thin is that I don't even like Limes and there was a big bald guy there just chilling in the juice.
The bald guy started singing "Whole lot of love" by Led Zepplen, and then suddenly they were all resurected from the dead the stand in my room.
We ordered a pepporoni pizza, "dance party!!!"
Then some body chucked a grenade through the window.
It exploded and stuff, went everywhere, I ran from the room screaming.
I hid behind the couch and when it settled I started to laugh.
The cow jumped over the moon.
The landing wasn't quite so smooth... and that was the end of the cow.
This time it is different.
The rule was that you could only see what the person before you wrote. So as after you put down your sentence, you fold the sentence that you read and passed it on.
Sadly a lot of them came out grusome/slightly crude; but we all seem to laugh.
Story ONE
I never expected that one day I'd open my closet and find... an actual monster inside. It was nighttime and I was doing a little tidying before bed when I opened my closet to see my greatest few staring at me.
A dwarf with a beard several feet long holding a copy of the Bible.
The beard reminded me of a holy man he must have been that hairy missionary I saw on the news.
But I suppose that man wasn't holt at all, for out of my memory the holy man stepped, with horns on his head and hooves for feet.
It was Michael Jackson, resurrected from the dead!
I screemed and grabbed a bazooka, blasting the unholy being
It didn't do much, besides blasting a huge hole in its middle.
Like an uber belly button.
Since it was like an uber bely button, it flopped and jiggled like Chris Farley on speed. Eventually it died of exaution.
Story TWO
I never expected that one day I'd open my closet and find... another door. One that led to a world where life and death meant nothing to anyone.
It was a chaotic but wonderful place, a place where everyone could do as they pleased.
Clothing was optional.
And of course I was stark naked as clothes are quite limiting.
It was breathtaking when money started flowing from my butt like a broken ATM machine.
Until the quarters, and 50 cent coins started coming out.
Then I yelled and jumped for joy at the vending flow of coins.
Ca-ching! Yes! This is why I love Las Vegas!
Because of the gambling and the buffets and the shoes
Story THREE
I never expected that one day I'd open my closet and find... a bathtub full of lime juice.
The strange thin is that I don't even like Limes and there was a big bald guy there just chilling in the juice.
The bald guy started singing "Whole lot of love" by Led Zepplen, and then suddenly they were all resurected from the dead the stand in my room.
We ordered a pepporoni pizza, "dance party!!!"
Then some body chucked a grenade through the window.
It exploded and stuff, went everywhere, I ran from the room screaming.
I hid behind the couch and when it settled I started to laugh.
The cow jumped over the moon.
The landing wasn't quite so smooth... and that was the end of the cow.
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